All too often, I have seen the damage done by self-criticism. I have shared the message that self-esteem wounds and self-critical thoughts are learned, but not accurate. I have pointed out the fact that such thinking is destructive and dangerous.

I thought that this comparison might get the message across. Here are seven ways that your self-critical brain is like a terrorist.

1. Your self-critical brain and the terrorist began as innocents without hate.

You weren’t born self-critical. You were born innocent and precious just any other baby. You had no positive or negative self-esteem. Likewise, the terrorist was not born hating others. He was like any other innocent baby. You weren’t born hating or criticizing yourself either.

2. Your self-critical brain and the terrorist were given the wrong messages.

The terrorist was taught to hate. The terrorist was taught that certain others were the enemy. The negative messages you received, early in your childhood, taught you to dislike yourself. The messages taught you that you were the enemy and you’ve treated yourself that way ever since. Those messages were destructive lies. The terrorist’s messages were as well.

3. Your self-critical brain and the terrorist were restricted from hearing the right messages.

The terrorist was surrounded by people who preached a message of hate. In childhood, most terrorists were not exposed to outside influences. He didn’t have the opportunity to see that other groups were made up of humans much like him. Later in life, he may have been exposed to people outside his group, but he looked at them with distrust. His attention focused on the negative characteristics of the “others.” His skewed perceptions only strengthened his belief that the “others” were the enemy and should be hurt or eliminated.

Likewise, your self-critical brain restricts you from hearing right messages. You pay attention to the times when you are criticized or when you fail. Your brain discounts your successes as luck, or as unimportant. You imagine others are criticizing you, even when they aren’t thinking of you at all. As a result, you are impacted by the negative messages and are restricted from positive experiences.

4. Your self-critical brain and the terrorist simply absorbed what was given.

A sponge will soak up whatever it is exposed to. If it is placed in pure, clean water, it will soak it up. If it is exposed to acid, it will soak that up as easily. The sponge doesn’t differentiate. Children are the same. If a child is exposed to messages of hate and terror, they will soak that up. If they are exposed to messages of criticism and inadequacy, they will absorb that as well.

5. Your self-critical brain and the terrorist consistently act on their beliefs.

A terrorist seems to be consistent. His choices, thoughts and emotions are guided by his learned beliefs of hate. He may not be doing anything destructive right now, but he is simply waiting on the opportunity. Your self-critical brain is also consistent. Your choices, thoughts and emotions are dictated by your self-esteem wounds. A little self-examination will reveal that your self-critical perceptions infiltrate every aspect of your life.

6. Your self-critical brain and the terrorist will hurt (or kill) you.

The terrorist is dangerous. His purpose is to hurt and kill those outside his group. He rejoices in the terrorist act, because that is his mission. Your self-critical brain will also hurt you. Each self-critical thought chips away at your sense of worth or competency. Your self-critical brain can also kill you. Most suicide victims believed the world would be better off without them. They mistakenly believed that they were a problem to the ones they loved. They then acted to eliminate the problem.

7. Your self-critical brain and the terrorist can change.

There are a few examples of terrorists who changed their beliefs of hate. Somehow, they were able to see that those outside their group were humans just like them. They abandoned their terrorist mission. Your self-critical brain can change as well. Like the terrorist, you will have to be exposed to competing messages. You will have to see strong evidence that your self-critical beliefs were destructive and wrong. You will have to be deliberate at changing these beliefs. It will take time, but it can happen. Begin today.

You can master the tools to change your self-critical beliefs and thoughts in my book, “Parables for a Wounded Heart: Overcoming the Wounds to Your Self-Esteem and Transforming Your Perception of You.” You can find it at Amazon.com:

Question: Can you see other similarities between the self-critical brain and a terrorist? Do you have any other comparisons? If so, please share.